2018 Was…

January 2, 20191 Comment

2018 was a very memorable experience for me. I woke up to posts talking about all the negativity in 2018 and yet I don’t remember it. Sure, I’m very aware of the social and political issues of 2018 but in our individual lives, outside of those issues that may affect you personally, 2018 was not a bad year, in my experience.

From my point of view, 2018 was a year of hope and resilience. 2018 was the year that we conquered our fears, we stood up to bullies, and stood our grounds in support of the things we believed in. 2018 was a year of great losses but also a year of great victories. After every shadow that threatened to swallow us in sorrow, came a dawn of warm sunlight and positivity that made us believe in humanity again. Behind every viral video of injustice, there was a video of inspiration and love that helped remind me that the world isn’t so black and white. I was reminded that people are good and can do good when given the chance and the tools to change someone’s life.

2018 was the year that one of my aunts who is in her late 50s and a young lady I knew from high school, who is in her mid 20s, both beat breast cancer. 2018 was also the year I fold out I have a lump in my own breast and although it isn’t cancerous right now, my doctors want to monitor it for the next two years due to my family’s history with cancers. 2018 was the year I thought I had breast cancer. 2018 was the year that I realized that my life could end at the age of 23 and I was forced to ask myself if I was happy with myself, my achievements, and where I was in life.

2018 was the year I dared to have dreams and hopes for the future.

2018 was the year I lost weight but gained a love and appreciation for myself that I thought I’d already had. 2018 was the year that I vowed to take my health more seriously because the thought of death by preventable diseases scared me.

2018 was the year I moved to a different state only to move back home three months later after the job fell apart and I’d nearly maxed out all of my credit cards.

2018 was the year I made the first move, romantically, even when I’ve been told that women should not.

2018 was the year I learned a new skill: photography and tried (and failed) to start a photography business. But from this failure, I eased my foot into a different door of opportunity.

2018 was the year I finally got an “adult” job and although I’m still settling in, I can finally see how good it feels to be able to take care of myself financially.

2018 was the year that I told myself I was going to write a book and so therefore I did. I wrote the first draft of a 257 page novel over the course of three months and realized the only thing standing between me and the things I desire is…me.

2018 wasn’t a horrible year for me. It was a memorable one. A year that taught me lessons I will take into 2019.

What did your 2018 teach you?

Eight Goals For 2018

January 2, 2018January 2, 20181 Comment

Hey everyone, welcome to 2018. Another year has come and gone and with the changing of the year, comes new goals and new achievements.

Here are my eight goals for 2018…

1. Lose 30 lbs

I know, I know. It’s a bit cliche but weight loss is a goal of mine this year but until like most people, I have an actual quantitative goal here. Plus, I started my weight loss journey last year when I went from a size 16 to a size 14. I think it’s super important to have an tangible weight or size in mind when trying to lose weight. It makes the process not so mysterious. There are tons of people who want to lose weight and get fit but because their goal is so aloof they never achieve anything because they never have a set goal to reach. I also think it’s important to set realistic goals for yourself when it comes to weight loss. Losing 30 lbs is very doable over the span of a year. It’s actually doable in the span of 3 to 4 months but that requires a lot of dedication and focus.

2. Read More Books

I haven’t read a book for fun in four years. I know, that’s crazy, right? I used to devour books but college killed that for me. I had to do a lot of reading for school, whether it was literary novels, textbooks, screenplays, articles from pretentious scholarly journals, or non-fiction books. By the time I was done with those, I was burned out and didn’t want to do anything but watch movies and television, which wasn’t all bad because that helped me with my studies. But I would like to get back into the habit of reading for fun again, especially genre fiction.

3. Make More Meaningful Connections

I’ve touched on this subject before on the blog. I want to make more friends but I want these relationships to be more meaningful. I’m still young so in theory, it should be easy for me to find people to link up with. But I’m starting to realize not all friendships are genuine. Sure, I was aware that there are some friendships that exist purely out of envy. This is where you get the frenemies complex. But that’s not what I’m talking about. I went through a lot of personal stuff last year and when I really needed people to lean on, the people I considered my closest friends didn’t even reach out. It was the first time in a long time that I honestly felt like I was alone and I was really hurt by it all because I’m usually the emotional support in my group of friends. To know I couldn’t receive that same support, especially when I rarely ask for it, made me see my friends in a very different light. And so, developing more meaningful connections is a major goal of mine for 2018.

4. Write More

This one is very self-explanatory. At the beginning of each year, I always set a goal for myself in regards to the amount or types of creative pieces I create. This year, I would like to write at least two novels and a screenplay. It sounds like a lot, but it really isn’t. As long as I keep to my deadlines, this should be pretty achievable. I just have to stay motivated and plan accordingly.

5. Take A Trip

I’m really trying to focus on saving money this year, so I don’t plan on doing a lot of travel but I would like to take at least one trip this year.

6. Take More Chances

I’m a pretty cautious person. I’ll even admit to being an overthinker but this year, I would like to put myself out there more. You know, engage in some crazy activity and be more socially adventurous especially since my physical location isn’t going to change much this year. This also goes hand in hand with developing more meaningful relationships. I really want to have a more exciting social life. I sometimes feel like I’m all work and no play. I want to change that.

7. Find A Job

Well, actually, I have a job but it’s not in my degree field which is understandable because I have a scriptwriting degree and I don’t live in California or a very big city for that matter. St. Louis is a hub for start-up companies that relocate the moment they get enough funding. We’re not a bustling city and the only work I could probably find St. Louis with my scriptwriting degree would be in theatre because we actually have a decent theatre scene here, but I dislike writing stageplays. The world is cruel and full of irony.m, I know. After some serious thought, I realize I’m selling myself short. Sure, my degree focuses primarily on writing for film and television but I also had to take the same core curriculum as the students that majored in journalism, public relations, and mass communications. If I can’t find a screenwriting position in St. Louis, maybe I should search for a job in one of the related industries.

8. Stop Doubting Myself

This is a big one for myself and it’s also going to be the hardest to achieve for several reasons. It’s easy to achieve goals such as travel, writing, or job hunting but it’s much harder to achieve goals that depend solely on your inner self. There is nothing I can work towards. Nothing I can plan. Nothing I can save for. This is a goal that has to be achieved based solely on my ability to believe in myself.

Welcome To 2017

January 9, 2017October 1, 20171 Comment

Welcome to 2017, congratulations for making it through 2016…also known as the year that sucked. Now I’m not the only one that felt that way, there are plenty of people on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Snapchat, and Instagram that felt the same way. But why? Why did 2016 suck so much? I could look at all of the hate, fear, anger, and social anxiety that blossomed and caused America to basically self-implode, but I’m not going to bring that up. Nope. That ugliness is for 2016 and it’s going to stay there, hopefully…just kidding, we’re only 9 days into 2017 and the world has already crapped on a lot of parades but that’s not what this post is about. No, this post is about all the good and positive things that are going to happen in 2017.

I’m Black, young, educated, and talented and I’ll be damned if I don’t shine brightly in 2017. I want to sprinkle Black Girl Magic all over the world, especially all over the lives of my grumpy Facebook friends who are always mad about something. At least when I’m mad about something, usually social issues, I balance my posting with silly memes because I’m the Meme Queen. But enough of that, let’s get back to the point. 2017 is going to be great. It’s going to be a year that is full of everyone excelling and showcasing what makes them great and how they are bettering society. You can do it. I have faith in the human race and if we don’t, well at least I’m 21 and can drink my way to success and an early grave.

Don’t give me that look. That’s how all the tragically great writers do it. They have really crappy lives, they drink away their sorrows and in glaring moments of sobriety they pour their heart, soul, and misery into their work and then we, the consumer, devour their work and tear it to shreds…and the cycle continues.

But anyway, I’m getting off topic again. 2017. Yes, 2017 is going to be fantastic. This is the year I’m truly going to raise the bar and change my life. I might sound like every person on January the first after they’ve looked over their New Year’s Resolutions but I’m so serious. There are just too many important things that are going to happen in my life this year for me to believe this year isn’t going to be amazing. I graduate from college this year. I’m a first generation Black student that not only finished college but excelled in it. Through my college education, I was able to study abroad and visit multiple countries. Through my college education, I’ve become a stronger and more independent human being and a better person. (Insert brownie points, please.)

I don’t know about you but that’s some great stuff to do before you’re 21 and yes by this point in my life I thought I would have everything mapped out already but I was wrong. Maybe the reason I’m so excited about this year is because this is the year that my adult life truly starts. This will be the first time in 18 years that I will not return to school in the fall. That’s amazing, but freedom comes with responsibility. This is also the first year that I’ll work full-time, start paying on my student loans, start looking at apartments, and take full responsibility for my health insurance… because my mom can’t do that forever.

2017 is also the year that I’ll finally be able to pursue my writing career; make new friends; get braces (as an adult because I was stupid as a kid); travel more; love more; grow more, and just experience life more. Hopefully, you’ll be there with me. Until then, welcome to 2017–the year of adulting.

May 2017 treat you better than 2016 ever did.